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Facts from the wild frontier… and other useless whatevers. Compiled over time, and I may do this again from time to time.

Bush is in over his head” [followed by a link to an MTV.com article]

the president is ‘pro-life with three exceptions’: rape, incest or when there is a threat to a woman’s life

Anyone urinating in this area will be discharged.

A 67-year-old Canyon County man who claims he has not eaten since early January to force the Idaho Legislature to pass an anti-abortion law” […] “The father of 16 children says he’s lost 50 pounds so far and can no longer feed the many animals that live on his Wilder farm.

Spit as little as possible and never upon the floor.

The Web is ‘highly unusual & postapocalyptic circumstances.’

One expert says sometimes big balls of ice just fall from the sky without any explanation.

It’s days like today I wish I had a bedet.

the first case in history in which fires leveled a steel frame building

There is a cycle to life much like a woman’s legs: things get harrier and things get clean-shaven.

I’m a big fan of the environment.

Don’t worry, if you have nothing to hide there will never be a reason to attach electrodes to your genitals.

fucking crazies

Believe me, if I could design a virus that would leave scalpers totally impotent, mute, and penniless, I would. Same goes for lawyers. (I have a whole different virus in mind for mini vans. More on that later.)

We have never fought a country that has a McDonalds.

Harvest the carrots and dodge the anvils.

ron jeremy is wearing a mario suit and flippin me off

Hmm 512 bytes to format a decimal integer sounds a little abusive

Misery accomplished

Loss of park space is both real and frightening.

[holding a banana]”This is an atheist’s worst nightmare.

When I was a kid, I fucked a bag of butter.

[linking to moveable type]”Powered (hindered?) by an embarrassingly unintuitive CMS

If the King’s English was good enough for Jesus Christ, it’s good enough for us!

Thank you for taking the time to share your favorite movie “The Return of the Pirate Bay” with us. We appreciate your interest in the Motion Picture Association and the motion picture industry. Your views are important to us.

When you kiss someone you’re forming one long tube with buttholes on either end.

I can’t even form a thought because these skulls keep chasing me!

Dream places remind me of how I think people felt in the 1960s and stuff

I survived 30 minutes of 1 second io scheduler switching with a very busy io load and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.

Everybody has a uniform that says security on it.

…replace the bed sheet with ten-dimensional space-time…